Society

Age Lab: 70% expect family care, but only 30% discuss it

Name: Age Lab: 70% expect family care, but only 30% discuss it
Uploaded: 2026-07-30T09:17:00+00:00
Description: Coughlin says an MIT Age Lab study with insurer John Hancock found most people assume a spouse or adult child will provide care, while far fewer have talked through expectations and practicalities. He frames the gap as a driver of crisis decisions when someone becomes suddenly unwell or injured.

The Mel Robbins Podcast · MIT Longevity Expert: Do These 3 Things Now to Stay Young, Live Longer, & Keep Doing What You Love · July 30, 2026

The Mel Robbins Podcast

MIT Longevity Expert: Do These 3 Things Now to Stay Young, Live Longer, & Keep Doing What You Love

"“Our same study with Hancock indicated 70% of us believe that our significant other or our adult child will provide us with care. Only 30% of us have had the conversation.”"

Coughlin says an MIT Age Lab study with insurer John Hancock found most people assume a spouse or adult child will provide care, while far fewer have talked through expectations and practicalities. He frames the gap as a driver of crisis decisions when someone becomes suddenly unwell or injured.

About this episode

Mel Robbins interviews Dr Joseph Coughlin, founder and director of MIT’s Age Lab, about what he calls “longevity planning” — preparing not only financially but practically and socially for decades of later life. A central segment has Robbins wear the lab’s “AGNES” ageing simulation suit, adding weight, restricted movement and impaired vision to recreate the friction, fatigue and frustration that can accompany age-related conditions. The experience is used to explain why older adults may withdraw from activities, avoid stairs, struggle with low chairs, or opt out of technology.

Coughlin argues that retirement is often planned as leisure but lived as thousands of ordinary “Tuesdays”, and urges listeners to identify small joys, build routines, and maintain social ties. He cites research comparing loneliness to the health impact of smoking, and suggests a robust friendship network is a strong predictor of ageing well.

He then outlines a “longevity preparedness index” developed with partners at John Hancock, covering eight dimensions including health, finance, community, home, life transitions, daily activities, social connection and caregiving. He says caregiving scores lowest and adds that many people expect family care without having explicit conversations. He also emphasises transport as a major cost and constraint in later life, and argues that where someone lives — down to their postcode — can shape longevity through access to services, mobility and connection.

Key takeaways

Coughlin frames ageing as “diminishing capacity over time” and argues resistance training, nutrition and learning can extend functional independence.
Robbins wears the MIT Age Lab’s AGNES simulation suit to demonstrate how mobility limits, low vision and reduced dexterity can shrink daily life and confidence.
Coughlin says social isolation carries major health risks and urges people to treat friendships as a “social portfolio”.
He describes an eight-part “longevity preparedness index” developed with John Hancock, intended to guide family planning beyond money and medical issues.
Coughlin says caregiving preparedness scores lowest in the index and warns many families have not had explicit conversations about care.
He argues transport is a key constraint in later life and a practical burden for caregivers, especially in suburban and rural areas.
Coughlin claims fraud and scams affecting older adults are often perpetrated by someone close, not only strangers online.