Call Her Daddy
Episode overview

Janelle Monáe: We Should Thank Our Exes

Call Her Daddy · 1h 7m · 3 Egleze moments
Janelle Monáe: We Should Thank Our Exes
Episode summary

Alex Cooper interviews Janelle Monáe about The Age of Pleasure, which Monáe frames less as an album than a “soundtrack to a lifestyle” centred on safety, joy and sexual self-possession. Monáe describes an unusually practical creative process: writing tracks days before hosting parties, then playing them to friends without credit and deciding what made the record based on whether people danced, sat down, or tried to Shazam the songs.

The conversation turns to personal history and therapy. Monáe says she carried rejection and abandonment trauma rooted in her father’s addiction and inconsistent presence, later compounded by periods when he was imprisoned. She says forgiveness and speaking directly with him changed their relationship and helped her manage break-ups and creative vulnerability. Monáe argues therapy should be universally accessible and describes learning to protect her sense of self from public judgement.

On relationships, Monáe explains why she keeps her dating life private and warns against treating social media posts as proof of love. She says she has been in polyamorous relationships and describes how one began when a third person was attracted to both her and her partner, emphasising ongoing communication as essential. Discussing conservative religious norms around sex, she criticises sexual shame and recounts seeing people marry early to legitimise sex, framing it as part of reclaiming pleasure and bodily autonomy.

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3 moments from this episode

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01
Entertainment

Janelle Monáe says she tested new tracks at house parties

Janelle Monáe describes using private house parties to ‘road-test’ songs that later appeared on The Age of Pleasure, saying she would write tracks during the week and play them to friends without telling them she was the artist. She says she watched crowd reactions, including whether guests reached for Shazam, and dropped songs that did not keep people dancing.

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03
Relationships & Family

Janelle Monáe says she has been in polyamorous relationships

Monáe says she has experience of polyamory and argues that making it work depends on direct communication about jealousy, time and boundaries. She later describes her first polyamorous relationship as emerging from an existing partnership, where a third person was attracted to both her and her partner and “we just made it work.”

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